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June 26, 2010

US loses to Ghana 1-2

It was a good run United States. I didn't think they would get this far but we'll take all the cheezy goals we can get and all the ties we can squeek by with. I don't know what Coach Bradley said to his team at the half but perhaps he should have said it at the beginning of the game- it reminded me of the super lame Super Bowl 2008.

I blame the candy ass soccer moms for this loss. Had you been more focused on teaching your kids how to win a game  instead making everyone, including the losers, feel good about just playing the game perhaps we would have beaten Ghana.

In case you missed it, last week a college student made this video celebrating Donovan's goal last Wednesday that got the US into the final 16. File under "Short but Sweet".

June 21, 2010

Portugal spanks N. Korea 7-0, countdown to firing squad begins.

The disgust of the Iraqi head of sports came to a climax when it was discovered that Uday, one of Saddam's sicko sons, tortured and murdered Iraqi professional athletes who lost games. In 1980 Iraq sent 46 athletes to the Olympic games; in 2000 they sent just 4 to the Games in Sydney. Hmm, right after Uday took over people stopped wanting to play sports for the country of Iraq.

I wonder if the same fate will fall to the North Korean soccer team after the 7-0 ass whipping they received from Portugal.  The game was televised to residents of PRK (for the first time in decades?) but was abruptly cut short after the following announcement: 
"The Portuguese won the game and now have four points. We arending our live broadcast now
A brilliant quote from the soccer coach, Kim Jong Hun, concerning the loss, and similar to Ron Atkinson's "Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.", made me wonder just how bad the soccer team has it.

June 8, 2010

LSU Adpots Mercy Rule: Whiny kids excuses from studying

I recall going to my son's T-Ball game a number of years ago and watching his team beat the living piss out of the opponents. Granted, they were all 5 or 6 years old but it was still fun to watch. It had been a long time since I had witnessed a "Mercy Rule" in any game and was surprised to see the Umpire call the game only 25 or 30 minutes into the game- I think they were up 15 to 1 when the game was called. I was bummed I only got 30 minutes of beer drinking in before the drive home.

I remember walking to the car and hearing a mother console her son who was crying because they didn't win. She told him that the score doesn't matter and that he is a winner. This happened 7 or 8 years ago and I am ashamed, appalled and disgusted that this mercy rule (skunk rule), the "everybody is a winner" mentality has has grown to epic proportions. I do not think we have yet reached the unholy apex of turning our kids into pussies.

The evidence is all around: monkey bars removed from playgrounds because unsupervised, but playful, children keep breaking their arms, winners writing apology letters to the losers and many more stories like these that would make Doug Neidermeyer puke in his shiny chrome helmet. There will be fallout to the overzealousness of soccer moms and the people that feel the need to never let children feel so much as a scrapped knee on the rubber coated playgrounds- they will become pussies. Think I am being ridiculous or assinine?

Be careful to judge so quickly; it has already escalated to a new level of ridiculousness- some soccer mom kids at LSU had a teacher removed from her position because enough of them whined to the Administration about her class being too tough. Dominique G. Homberger was removed from her position because she made her students actually study. Every class began with a quiz and not many passed. This was a lower level Biology class but it was not an easy A.

And I quote, from a student to the Dean:
She has too many facts on her tests.
What the hell does that even mean? Her tests have too many facts. Not once in 30 years has anyone in administration questioned her teaching style. Not once in 30 years of teaching has a Dean sat in on her class, including Kevin Carman, dean of the College of Basic Sciences and Head Chump of the Pussification of America (LSU Chapter). Carman removed Homberger from her position without even talking to her first. But that's not even the worst part of this tragedy- he raised their grades by 30% across the board. Bravo, Dean Wormer- way to send the message to the sniveling students who don't have the discipline to study on their own that all they have to do is whine to the Dean about the mean old teacher and then- boom, roasted. I cant blame the students entirely because some PARENTS called and complained that little Suzy couldn't skank her way out of an F, or that little Johnny's football score from last night's game didn't mean jack to their biology teacher.

The circle is almost complete. The soccer moms have interjected once again on behalf of their children to make their college classes easier. The only thing left is a call to the boss in 5 years and tell him to reduce the workload on their kid. It is no wonder Asian and European kids laugh at our college graduates.

Here is LSU President John V. Lombardi's contact information, in case you want to send a shout out:
3810 W. Lakeshore Dr.
Rm. 107
Baton Rouge, LA 70808
Hold on to your seats; in 4-5 years the first round of soccer mom pussified kids will be entering the workforce. Don't be too hard on them if they forget your fries at the drive thru.