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April 16, 2013

This is why we don't need crying men


I have been writing this blog entry for a few months now piece by piece as more examples are uncovered displaying the downfall of men in this country. Although there are volumes that can be written on the political discourse of some men and how poorly they have shown themselves to stand up for what is right and, instead, cave in to the furthest reaches of the political spectrum. No, I think those men are too far gone to help as is this next group.

Over the last few decades I have seen the character of men degrade to the point that they think it is ok to cry over things that in prior decades would have wrought a showering of ridicule and bullying the likes few people today have been on the receiving end of. We had heroes back then like John Wayne, the Marlboro Man, Charles Bronson, Bear Bryant, Van Halen and the like. The idols I had as a young sprouting lad are much different than the ones trying to pass as legitimate teen idols we see forced down our throats today- Justin Beiber? Or the d-bag sparkly vampires and their sworn enemies that look like German shepherds? Really?

But why the shift from real men to real pussies as what we perceive to be heroic people we can look up to? That story is long and drawn out, but the Reader’s Digest edition would attribute society’s role in chipping away at the manliness that once held this nation together. We were told that real men should eat quiche, that we should get in touch with our feminine  sides, that it is ok for women to play in men’s only sporting events and to intrude in men’s only activities and the worst one of all- that it is ok to cry. This is where they went too far.

I am in a minority of men today who can hold in their emotions, who can keep some composure during a difficult time, who can step up and display levelheadedness during a crisis and there have been more than enough examples in our media over the last few decades to show the downward trend in men who display these attributes. But we only need to go back a few years to see some really disgusting examples of men who lost it and broke down in tears, babbled even, over things that just didn’t warrant crying. Before I come across as too callous, crying at the death of an immediate family member is acceptable, however you must come to grips with the fact that in that moment you were a wuss.

There are plenty of examples in history of the manliest men known to the world who shed tears – Eisenhower, Lincoln, Walter Cronkite and several sports greats when they finally retired from their art. It used to be that when a man cried there was some serious shit that just went down or was about to happen. But now we see crying all the time. It is common place now, and even worse- it is promoted. I must admit that there are a few things that will bring a temporary moment of wussiness upon myself. I am very patriotic and spent 20 years in the military. September 11th was hard on me and on a few occasions a tear or two have welled up in my eyes.  However, I also admit that in those times I am a wuss and I fight back those tears. So I cannot fault Jon Stewart or even David Letterman when they got emotional during their shows when reporting on September 11th. But they were still wusses.

When bad things happen we need a man to hold it together. We need him to hold it together so that he can be a leader during a crisis when having leadership matters the most. Remember this?



Louisville basketball player Kevin Ware suffered a gruesome injury during the playoffs when he broke his leg on the court. He didn’t just break his leg, it was like his leg was tired of being cooped up under all that muscle and skin and decided to bust out to have a look around. That’s a pretty horrific injury and I would expect some tears of pain, not emotion, from Ware. What disgusted me were the tears from his team mates and especially Coach Pitino. 



That is not the time for the leader of a basketball team to cry. Good job, coach. What a great example you are setting for these young men, who were also crying like babies on the most important, and televised, event of their lives. When the shit hits the fan we find out what men are made of.

How about this one? Here is Bubba Watson after winning the 2012 Masters. Pathetic and weak. First of all, it is golf and you can add this sport to the famous quote by Tom Hanks, “There’s no crying in baseball.” What’s next, crying when someone wins the National Shuttlecock Tournament?


Disgraceful. Like I said, there have been sports heroes over the years that have shed a tear or two, however it was a rare occasion. This idiot blubbers every time he is on television.

More examples of men who failed at holding it together can be found by a simple Google search for men crying at their wedding, during the birth of a child, crying because he climbed up on a jungle gym and couldn't get down (I shit you not) and lastly over a video game. What disturbs me even more is the fact that when they are called out for being wussies it is the accuser who gets the blast from people defending these crying idiots.

The final act that made me publish this post occurred yesterday when some chicken shit set off bombs at the Boston Marathon. We see glaring examples of both kinds of men- those who run toward the danger and those who run away and/or cry like babies. Like I said, when the shit hits the fan, and seeing pools of blood and body parts would definitely qualify, we see what men are made of. That is not the time or the place for someone who blubbers at a wedding or because he won a golf game. Thank God the first responders and bystanders had the wherewithal to keep their composure and start the task of first aid and providing strength and decorum to the injured and dying. I saw a man who was holding his wife/girlfriend’s head in his lap while she lay bleeding all over the place. He was calm and collected and that is what that woman needed.

While the many videos of the bombing are horrifying, they are well worth the watch if you want to see the kinds of men this country is losing.

3 comments:

  1. I agree with this for the most part, except for men who are in real physical pain, I had my 3 level spinal fusion surgery and they fucked me up and I never hurt so bad in my life and I could not stop the tears, I had to be heavily medicated and put into a coma, but I cried like hell due to shocking pain from the back of my head to my toes. It was automatic, I didn't even cry the day my Dad died, but I did cry a tear or two of joy when my son was born (ok, I was a wuss, but a happy wuss), and yes when I had my surgery which didn't go well and was riddled with complications. Maybe I was a wuss, but F-it it hurt like hell. I just think there is a clear distinction between physical and emotional pain. That's my take.

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  2. That isn't the kind of crying I'm talking ab out, Ray. Notice I didn't say anything about Ware crying with his bone sticking out of his leg. That is understandable as is intense pain from a freaking spinal surgery- although I would never let anyone see me cry under any circumstances.

    The worst pain I have felt would be the kidney stone I passed back in 2005 that was 7mm. I think I even took pictures of it and put it on The Dump. The second worst was when I threw my back out followed by a shot of Xylocain right into my open head would in Mare Island. Not one tear from me.

    But again, I'm talking about the blubbering sissies who make fools out of themselves when they cry over things that just don't warrant that much emotion.

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  3. You really just can't let go of the Twilight series.

    (not signing in, this is your lovely wife) :P

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