Search My Blog

November 21, 2006

Top News stories?

Playstation 3 Ridiculousness
It has been four days since the debut of the Playstation 3 and I am still shaking my head in disgust at the response by the people who bought them- stampedes, robberies, assaults, and shootings. Way to go assholes.

I remember a few years ago it was almost the same thing, just short of a soccer induced mob riot. There were plenty of PS3's on eBay all going for over $2000; one console went for $30,000. Yes, you read that right.

"Hmmm, do I want a car or a PS3?"

Idiots. All of them.

I put part of the blame on Sony for only sending out 400,000 of the consoles. No less than 1 million would have been my marketing strategy and my first impulse was to make Sony pay for the damages caused by thier games. Then I reevaluated that rash statement and realized that Sony is just capitalizing on moronic infatuation or greed on a cosmic level. Love that capitalism!

Drunk Drivers Beware
I remember driving back from the clubs and then realizing I was driving up to the base front gate but not remembering the trip there. I have wised up since then and always use a designated driver or take a cab back to my home. It is a pain in the ass to go back and get my car the next day but it is better than the headache involved with getting a DUI.

For all the losers who can't stay out of their vehicles after hitting the sauce, have no fear- those ladies at Mothers Against Drunk Driving are on a campaign to put a tattletale device in your ignition. Basically, you blow into a tube and if you are over the limit your car won't start. So, aside from paying a stranger $50 to blow into the device you will have to come back when your breath isn't tainted with the sweet fumes of Jack Daniels. New Mexico is getting geared up to make this device mandatory. Ole!

Web Site Victory
The California Supreme Court said yesterday that Internet publishers could not be held liable if they posted defamatory comments written by others. This is great news for companies who host blogs, like Google, because I can tell all the bleeding heart liberals out there to kiss my hairy corn hole and there is nothing they can do about it. The First Amendment is safe online, for now.

Stupid Celebrity Sex Videos
For all the losers who love to see celebrities having sex, instead of paid professionals who actually know what they are doing (except you Pamela, you know how to deepthroat jimma-jamma), Britney Spears has her honeymoon sex tape on the market. For free. That's right, the mother of 2 and the ex wife of Kevin "I smell like ass all the time" Fetterline, has decided to put the tape out for free so that Fetterline can't cash in on it, thus following in the footsteps of Pamela Anderson and Paris Hilton. What is it with blondes letting themselves get video tapped? Without having seen the tape I will make a bet that Brittaney knows how to suck the chrome off a Harley straightpipe. How else could she have made so much money making crap music.

Who Gives a Shit News
I almost put Britney's sex tape here but I found a few more articles more worthy.
* Tom & Katie on their honeymoon- whoopty doo
* Rosie O'Donnell criticizing The View- who cares what that fat retard says. Seriously.
* Mexico's elections- Brushing aside election results that declared him the loser in last summer’s polls, Andrés Manuel López Obrador had himself sworn in as Mexico’s legitimate president in a public ceremony full of fake pomp and splendour. Until that country stops helping thier citizens jump the fences they can kiss my ass.
* The U.N.- A divided UN nuclear watchdog has put off until Thursday ruling on Iran's bid for aid for a project the West fears could yield bomb-grade plutonium, but is still likely to block such assistance. Likely, but not definate. The U.N. has shown that it cannot be trusted with world security.
* Any news about sports.
* O.J. Simpson's book- Is this guy fucking serious? I am glad Fox had the sensibility to shitcan the whole thing.

2 comments:

  1. What really pisses me off about the Mexico election fiasco has been my own damn local newaspaper printing the Leftist-spin and acting like it's an legitimate response, and what the moron Al Gore should have done. Grrr!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Algore. That's another dipshit I like having around, like John Kerry, to make our side look good and their side like a bunch of R-tards. Until Mexico fully absolves The Dog of the crap charges, that whole government can go poop in a sombrero.

    ReplyDelete