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May 24, 2006

Dried up stinky dick licker

I freely admit to stealing that descriptor from Tollbooth Willy but it just so accurately depicts my feelings for Tommy Chong.

I heard the old Cheech and Chong standup this morning "Let's Make a Dope Deal" on the classic rock station as I was driving in to work. When it was over the DJ said something to the effect of that piece being a great piece of rock and roll history. I fail to see the connection between a famous, only-one-movie-roll-having pothead and rock and roll history.

Today is Tommy Chong's birthday, a testament that even though you can be brain dead your body can still function. I see Chong on local television ads for a store that sells bongs, incense, and pot head t-shirts. He looks like he just smoked a bowl before the shoot and I would venture to say the dweeb in the commercial with him got a hit or two off it.

Pot, or pako lolo, as the locals call it, is an inherent part of the culture in Hawaii. Last year at the Kokua Festival the smell of cannabis was as thick as the incoherent gibberish of the bastardized English locals use to communicate. Although I was flattered to have the tap on the shoulder, I declined to partake because all I can think about are the tools I saw smoking the weed who were acting like jackholes.

There is a big movement to legalize pot but I think the campaign is using the wrong people to promote it. Tommy Chong as the face man for the legalization of pot is like having Al Gore as the environmental protection protagonist. They both do nothing but turn me away from their cause.

Chong is scheduled to do his Marijuana-logue this week here in Waikiki. From the commercial spots, it looks like the same lame jokes he has been doing for 30+ years that only the stoners can really find funny nowadays. Chong needs to get current with his illegal substance jokes- it just seems like good marketing to me and would appeal to a broader druggie audience. Crystal meth is popular here in Hawaii and cocaine is always the drug of choice for big business upstarts.


  1. Tommy Chong is a total fag and a one trick fucking pony. At least Cheech Marin has had the common decency to move on with what little left there is of his career!

  2. Couldn't have said it better myself. Thanks for dropping by.