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December 21, 2004

What?

tourist.jpg
I posted some pictures of the monster surf a few days ago and after a recent visit to the same beach I had to post this shot.

Bear in mind that the locals who surf these monster waves were probably born on longboard and only got out of the water long enough to sleep, poop, and smoke some grass. I have seen these guys make the Stations of the Cross motion before going out to surf these waves. Ironically, local surfers were kept at bay from the huge waves after the Triple Crown competition Tuesday. How the heck are these people supposed to learn to ride the big ones when a guy shouting through a bullhorn from a helicopter is telling them to beat it?

As I was shooting the skinboarders making use of the unusually large beach breakers, I spotted this guy and his borderline obese wife getting knocked on their asses like Sunday night's Denver Broncos. They did have boogie boards but were fumbling with them like a monkey screwing a football until the lifeguard drove the 50 feet on his 4-wheeler to give them some advice.

I didn't hear what the lifeguard told this tourist specifically, but it probably was something a little more PC than, "Hey douchebag, you want to get killed? Go back to Waikiki." How do I know this guy was a tourist? I can only assume but I get a strong feeling because of the way he is looking at this local trying to figure out what the hell he is saying. Heavy on the pidgin, thick with the accent, the lifeguard could be speaking Latin to this guy as the both are probably just as foreign a language.

No matter how many people get killed by the big waves, the tourists always want to get as close as they can for a picture. That's like me going to NYC and deliberately walking down dark alleys in the Bronx. You will only be able to skirt diaster for so long.

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