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August 24, 2006

Another TSA security restriction

Mardin Amin, 29, was with his mother and two children on August 16th traveling from O'Hare to Turkey. A TSA agent pulled out an object fom Amin's bag and begin to eyball it.

Here is where the story gets interesting. Amir cliams he told the TSA agent the device was a 'pump', she claims Amir said 'bomb'. I assume Amir is Turkish and probably speaks with a thick accent. 'Bomb' sort of sounds like 'pump' in the way 'close' sounds like 'blow' on a sound powered phone on a submarine. Coincidentally, we say 'shut' instead of 'close' for that very reason.

TSA agents grabbed Amin and put him into custody and did not give him the time to explain that what the female TSA agent was holding was his penis pump. I guess that was his bag, baby.

It would be bad enough getting caught masterbating by your mother as a sexually frustrated adolescent, but getting busted with a penis pump in line at the airport while your mother is standing there would be enough to put anyone into therapy.

If convicted, Amir could face up to 3 years in prison. Two points to be made here:

1. Put equipment to ease your sexual inadequacies in your check on luggage.
2. Dude, those things don't work anyway. A, uh, friend of mine told me once.

To add to this ridiculous story, while searching for an image to put on this post I came across (no pun intended) a case that is still pending concerning a retired US Judge that used a penis pump while sitting in court presiding cases.


  1. If they send him to Guantanamo, I hope they let him take his penis pump. Better than a Koran to fill those empty hours between waterboardings.

  2. I'm sure the Marines at Gitmo could think of other ways to stretch the detainees' junk. I think a 2 lb weight tied to the tip could help out a lot.

  3. "penis pumps" "stretch the junk" "2 lb weights tied to the tip"

    So, that's what faggots like you two talk about! And what;s with the squirrel with big balls? Some kind of signal to your queer pals? I'm outta here!

  4. Grandpa, how many times do I have to tell you- Stop taking your medicine with vodka then posting on my blog.